|Mollie the Collie- 'should have gone to Specsavers'.|
Half the time me and my brothers refer to my dad as Dave and the rest of the time as Dad, so I have chosen to continue writing my blog and referring to him as Dave as you all will do.
A usual evening; coffee, television and Mollie the Collie barking and fighting Dave as he pretends to be a Great Dane…
Dave has always had animals and through great misfortune these pets were either somehow err…mentally challenged or just filled with hatred for Dave. A great example of this comes in the form of Sister Lettuce the rabbit that spent her life growling at him and chasing him up the stairs as he tried to escape her. Immediately I find myself pitying Sister Lettuce for her ridiculous name rather than sympathising with Dave for owning this possessed pet. There have been many animals that have taken a dislike to him. Like Dapper and Dammit the Dalmatians that Dave and his sister occasionally looked after for a neighbour when they were teenagers. Dapper and Dammit used to chase after Dave and even pin him up against a wall to bark continuously in his face until they freed their prisoner. They literally hounded him to the extent that he began to hide in cupboards to escape them.
Of course not all of his pets have bullied him; some have just been weird or have chosen to go to great lengths to avoid living with him. Such as Griff the dog who attempted to chew off his own feet after stepping on some stinging nettles, “there was blood everywhere”. Or Shed Cat, known as Shed Cat because his real name is long forgotten. There was a house move and then the usual cat disappearance, usually they return to their previous homes. Shed Cat, as you may have guessed simply moved into the garden and decided to live under a shed for a month undiscovered until his angry meow one day gave away his secret location.
Then there have been the ill pets…The Wet Gerbil who had flu and as the name suggests was always wet for an unknown reason. Not to mention Purdy the cat who was renamed ‘Sid Snot’ because she was diagnosed with having grass seed up her nose and was constantly sneezing.
Dave’s bad luck with animals seems to have filtered out a bit and Mollie the Collie is as challenging as a mental born- Irish rescue dog is expected to be. Our old dog Tess HATED humans and Mollie HATES dogs. One day we might get it right…